05 August 2011

It's that time again...

back to school... already!

{yes, they have a.c. in the buildings, otherwise they wouldn't be able to go to school until late September!}

The boys were pretty excited this morning.
as you can see...

thankfully, Daddy got to go into work late
(well, sorta, he had to go to work early to solve an unexpected problem but got to come back home for school drop-offs...)
it's a good thing too, because this is about as brave as momma's face got all morning.
(I thought I was going to be OK by the time we got to school, but Wilson's 1st grade teacher saw me and gave me a hug and the tears just kept on comin'...)

On the way in with full backpacks and teacher gifts!

The K students met in the gym (with the first graders, which is where I saw Mrs. T)... Walker waited very patiently in line, we finally left before they went to their classes for fear of momma having another breakdown; which would've been a rough way for Walker to start school!
Wilson was pretty embarrassed that I was crying, which made it all the sweeter that he has the same teacher and mostly the same classmates as last year. He teased me about it a little as we walked down the hall to his class. I tried to blame it on Mrs. T. but he called me out and said, "You did it even before we left the house!"

He wasn't nervous at all to get to class. he gave Mrs. Z a hug while I grabbed a tissue! Mrs. Z. even graciously offered to let me volunteer once a week after seeing my swollen-crying eyes.

I knew it would be harder letting Walker go to K. Mainly because the house is now empty besides me and that big dog. To complicate matters, I sort of anticipated our new baby-child being home by now. Which leaves me in a place of unexpected empty hands. I've hesitated to commit to anything, because I was certain our new baby-child would be home by now. Through my tears this morning, God reminded me that He is not the least bit surprised by these circumstances. And in that reassurance, I do find peace. Sure, there are tears. And I am OK with that.

To clarify, the tears weren't really out of concern about whether or not Walker would do well at school. They weren't because I'm afraid. The tears fell because time has passed. And quite honestly, whether we had a new baby-child here or not, I most likely would've still been a bawl-baby this morning. Because my boys are growing up. They are getting bigger and this letting-go is hard. And so my tears are the way that I process it. I wish I were a little better at controlling when they would pour out; or at the very least, wish I had one of those faces that didn't get all blotchy-red immediately. But alas, this is who I am and how God made me. So I post pics to tell you that we are where we are supposed to be today. Each one of us. And God has gone before us to prepare the way. He has good plans, and we are blessed to be a part of them.

this morning God gave me two verses to center me and remind me He is faithful...

"In the fear of the Lord there is strong confidence, and His children will have refuge." Proverbs 14:26

"Jesus said to him, "Go your son lives." The man believed the word that Jesus spoke to him and started off." John 4:50


  1. Oh, Amanda! If I could jump through the computer and hug you, I would. I feel for you & completely understand.

  2. Your Mom let a few of those tears fall too, so I understand just what you're saying. I know that the tears fall because we feel blessed to be a part of their lives too! Thanks so much for sharing the pictures, I never would have thought you would get them up so fast! You amaze me sometimes!

  3. I just read through that post and have to a amend it a little....you and your sister amaze me MOST the time!

  4. Oh~ to have your baby in school... I'm a little choked up thinking about it. I remember the very hard days with Brendan. Now I wait (cause I hate to say that I dread) for the day that he leaves home to be on his own. From kindergarten to 10th grade, time has flown so fast I can hardly understand how this nearly 6' boy looks down on me now. I know without a doubt that being a mom is one of the sweetest gifts God gives us. One that helps us to understand His heart more than probably any other position in this world. You are a great mom and I'm so glad to have you as a friend. I am sure the day went well for both boys.

  5. before we even start school I'm already anxious for their first day off! I've never ever understood a parent who looks forward to their kids going back to school, who dreads their days off and summer vacation! I love having the kids home, I enjoy their laughter, and am so very thankful they want to be home with me! its a gift; one that I treasure. I always cry as I drop them off to their classes; this year will be very different just having Colson in elementary!

    I will be praying that God gives you a purpose to your day and that He will help you as you wait for the newest little one to arrive.